Culture Shock vs Reverse Culture Shock

One thing I have had many, many people ask me about is culture shock. For anyone curious, culture shock is:

1. ... the personal disorientation a person may feel when experiencing an unfamiliar way of life due to immigration or a visit to a new country, a move between social environments, or simply travel to another type of life. [Thank you wikipedia!]

Funnily enough, I didn't really experience jolting, horrible culture shock. I think most people that I know who traveled to Korea also didn't experience a huge bout of culture shock. Why? Thanks to how connected we all are in this wonderful day and age of the internet, it's fairly easy to find out exactly what to expect when traveling to a new country. There are many different blogs and websites that tell you what others experienced, the differences in culture, in what is expected and okay, etc. And it's that knowledge that helps keep most people from experiencing frustrating, or even debilitating, culture shock. 

Of course, I had the added little incentive that many girls, and even some guys, who visit Korea have: the love of Kpop and Kdramas. Yup, if you know me, you know just how guilty I am of loving most things that come from the Korean Entertainment industry. Korean songs, Korean TV programs, Korean dramas... Mind you, I also love American TV shows, British TV shows, American songs, Japanese Songs, a few French pop songs, etc. But the fact that I was extremely excited about traveling to Korea to work also made the experience that much easier for me.

Now that is not to say that I didn't experience some culture shock, because I did. I distinctly remember one evening, I got into a taxi to go home from downtown. It was after I had been in Daegu around 9 months, so I knew enough Korean at that point to tell him how to get to my place, but he didn't understand me. When he finally did, he muttered in Korean the entire drive and was very discourteous. Within that next week, I had another taxi driver do almost the exact same thing, except that this one actually took me to the wrong station. I said Banwoldang, but he heard Beomeodang. Well, actually, he asked me 4 times where I was going. I said "beonwoldong" the first time by accident, then I said it the correct way 3 times after that. He then repeated it to me, but he had a very thick accent and it was difficult to understand him. I tried showing him my phone, but he waved it away and repeated again. It sounded like "beomwolddong" and I finally just said yes. Well, we arrived at the wrong place and he got pissed at me and turned off the meter before driving me to the correct place and charging me about double what it should have cost. Needless to say, by the end of that ride, all I could think was how much I wished I was back in the US with people I could communicate with easily. But within 24 hours, I was back to loving where I was living and the culture shock was over and done with. So I guess the main culture shock I had: lack of ability to communicate.

Fast forward to May of 2015. After 2 years in Korea, I came back to the US for the summer and the thing that hit me hardest? Reverse Culture Shock. "But Nicole!" you say. "There's no such thing! How could you have culture shock by coming home to your native country?!" Eee! Wrong. Reverse culture shock is a real thing, especially for people who live outside of their home country for an extended period of time. And after 2 years away, I had managed to unremember all of the bad things about the US and had gotten so used to the way things were in Korea that it was a genuine shock, and sometimes extremely frustrating, to find it was different in the US. I've encountered a handful of things actually, but there are 3 main ones that have stuck out like sore thumbs to me.

1. Rudeness/ Selfishness- I don't mean everyone is extremely rude and selfish. In fact, it was something I was kind of expecting. In Korea, everyone is extremely respectful of others, even if they hate your guts. If someone in customer service isn't polite and helpful, that is instant grounds for dismissal from their job. In schools, students generally aren't disrespectful to their teachers. Yes, it happens, but on a far smaller scale than schools in the US. Now, the thing that finally pushed me to frustration was Universal Studios. Being around all of those people who were pushing and shoving and not being away of who or what was around them... It finally got to me.
2. Catcalling- Do I really need to explain this one? Walked around downtown Atlanta for a total of 5 minutes and got catcalled. Walked around downtown Daegu and downtown Seoul numerous times, sometimes past 1am, without a single catcall. I know catcalling isn't something that is high on other people's list, but I absolutely hate it. The End.
3. Portion sizes- This one is strange, I know. I was raised on the phrase "Clean your plate". If you didn't, you had to sit there at the dinner table until bedtime. It's a good rule for picky eaters, but a bad rule when you just honestly aren't hungry (but people think you're a picky eater). So I've always had a problem consciously leaving food on my plate. Then I went to Korea and... it was amazing. The portion sizes are usually SO much smaller than in the States! Plus they serve side dishes before every meal. Yummy, usually pretty good for you, side dishes that help fill you up. Side dishes + smaller portion sizes? Easier to diet/ lose weight = good deal for me! No pre-meal side dishes + larger portion sizes? Harder to diet = gain back weight I had lost in Korean.

Wow, so I just realized how long this is, and I am SO sorry. But if you've made it all the way to the end here then... congrats!!

In conclusion-
Yes, I suffered from a tiny bit of culture shock, mainly from the inability to communicate, but mostly I suffered reverse culture shock when I got home. The way people treat others, the way some people can be extremely rude, selfish, and pushy, the catcalling, feeling unsafe walking outside by yourself, and, surprisingly enough, the larger portion sizes all made it very difficult to adjust to being back in the states. So if you ever have someone coming back to the US after living overseas for more than a year, be prepared for them to talk about how different it is from when they left, talk about how different it is from the country they just came from, and have a hard time in certain situations that would have been normal before they left.

You see a fat girl, I see FAI recovery

The other day, I had the joy of having a child (aka a punk little boy who wanted to look cool in front of his friends) call out "fatty" as I was riding my bike this evening. And at first, I wanted to cry, but then? I smiled and almost laughed. I realized that most people who see me riding that bike around will only see the bad things, but me? I see something completely different.

I started my weight loss journey in November of 2012, after a tough year full of horrible feelings and failures and eating my failures. I started eating better and working out a lot, and I actually liked it. But I noticed more and more problems with my right hip and right knee. Fast forward to October of 2013 to where I was diagnosed with FAI in my hip and a likely tear caused by the cam impingement of my hip. At that point, I had cut down on my walks due to the pain, and, unfortunately, wasn't able to pick up the cardio again. A year went by and I gained a portion of the weight back that I had originally lost. It got to the point I couldn't even walk up stairs or walk more than a mile, and even that had to be done slowly. Now? I walked 23 miles over 2 days while at Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure in Orlando, Florida. I can bike 10 miles in a little under 60 minutes. I walked my first 5K. I am working to lose the weight I gained back and more with the knowledge that every mile I walk, bike, or run puts me 1 mile closer to the surgery I will eventually need on my second hip. So for that punk kid, those teenagers who pointed at me the other day, and anyone else who wants to judge me:

You see a butt that doesn't fit on the seat,

I see a butt that was very comfortable during my recovery period.

You see wide hips that take up far too much room,

I see a hip gaining muscle back after recovering from surgery and lack of use while the other finally takes a break after doing enough work for both for many months.

You see a tummy that’s slightly too big,

I see a stomach that’s struggling to go back to its old shape after keeping my energy & spirits up after surgery.

You see the sweat on my forehead and my chest heaving in and out,

I see the effort my whole body is putting in to keep my legs moving to make it through that last mile.

You see a fat girl on a bike,

I see a young woman recovering from FAI surgery and taking things 1 mile at a time.

I know I'm overweight, and you know what? I'm working on it every day. I'm happy with the road I'm on. Why? Because I'm on the road to recovery. And I can fix being overweight. It's a little harder to fix being a judgemental **insert appropriate noun here**.

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Sorry for this post, but it is something that has been on my mind for almost a week, so I decided to write it down to free up some space in there ^^

Back in the saddle!

Well, it's been over four months, but I'm back again! Let's try and give this another shot, shall we?

I am currently about halfway through my vacation back to the US, and it has been packed full of fun and friends and amazing times. I spent almost a week with my sisters and mom visiting family and having fun in Ohio. I ran (okay, walked) my first 5K. I went to Universal Studios and Harry Potter World with my best friend. I also saw one of my other best friends get married. Not to mention all of the other meet ups and adventures scattered in there.

So why am I starting this blog back up now well... I stopped because I became busy AND because I was honestly just concerned that I was being silly. That I was writing posts and they just were not interesting or I wasn't writing about what people wanted to read.... But then I had a good friend today remind me: I'm not writing for others, I'm writing for myself, writing what I want to write about, writing about what is important to me. And he is completely right. I am going to continue to use this blog to keep people up to date with what is going on in my life, but I'm also going to use it to write about the things I am interested in, whether it's Kpop or a new movie or a food place I find down the street.

Some people write blogs specifically about food or places they visit, but this blog? It's gonna be your ticket straight into my brain. Hopefully I manage to keep the ride going this time ^^